The Attitude of Happiness

Every New Years, I hear a lot of people say “Thank goodness THAT year is over, and we are starting with a new one.”  Often, these same people said the same thing the year before.  I have a hard time being able to respond to that, being able to understand the reasoning.  It’s not just because that minute between 11:59 on December 31 and 12:00 on January 1 does not hold some kind of magic formula that suddenly makes everything right, it’s because I don’t understand how others don’t get that happiness is something that they actually control.

I’ve often been accused of having lived some charmed, perfect life because I believe that.  That could not be further from the truth, and I can tell you with certainty that I dealt with more stuff in my life by the time I was 15 than many people have when they are 50.  The difference, it’s attitude.

 

You are completely correct, attitude doesn’t make the bad things go away.  It does, however, help you to deal with them, to not allow them to overwhelm you or consume your life.  It does help you to see the good things that happen among the bad, the friend you would not have otherwise met, the trigger to change something in your life for the better, the love and outpouring of care from those around you.  To see the hope.

Sometimes it may take years to be able to look back at something and see those slivers of light, but they are there.  They are always there.

My problems didn’t end there, I’ve dealt with divorce, deaths of loved ones, health issues, financial difficulties, even abuse and rape among other things as I’ve aged, but I had already learned how to not let those bad things take over. The need to be able to act as an adult when I was 9 or 10, it has what has made me eager and able to see things as a child as an adult, to, in essence, have my childhood.  THAT has made me a better parent and often a better friend, to be able to find joy in the smallest things, to always be on the lookout for the silver lining.  Those bad things that happened in my life, they are what taught me what happiness really is, in all of its wondrous simplicity.  Without the bad, I couldn’t ever appreciate the good to its fullest.

My happiness doesn’t depend on my paycheck, how many friends I have, how pretty I am, who is President, or what health problems I do or do not have.  My happiness depends on ME, and I am in complete control of it.

Sometimes life gets hard, and that’s why they have wine, but in the end it is up to us to decide how we are going to let us affect us.

Here’s to 2018.  May it be just as great as every other year I have gotten to experience life, all of it, whatever it has thrown at me.