A few weeks ago I checked my son’s phone, and found
something disturbing. Among a few other unacceptable to this strict mom things, he and his friends
were calling each other the “N” word in conversations.
The only good thing is that I know my son wasn't using it to
be derogatory. He doesn't have a racist
bone in his body, nor any other discriminatory kind of bone. He is one of the most accepting people I've
ever met, and I’m not just saying that because he is my child. He just thought it was the “cool” thing to
say because other kids do. We don’t use
that word in our family, we live in a very diverse community of people who get
along (though reading the internet and other media, I feel like I must be
living in a strange dream), so it’s just not something he’s grown up with and
we've never had to have a discussion about it.
Until now.
When I explained that one of the reasons his phone was being
taken away for a while was his use of that word, he really didn't seem to
understand why it was so bad, after all, his black friends use it too.
A week ago, I watched “Selma” with him, a movie depicting
Martin Luther King, Jr. and the civil rights movement. During one quite dramatic scene, the word was
being thrown around in a very derogatory fashion. I asked my son “Now do you understand why we
don’t use that word?” He looked at me
with tears in his eyes and nodded. He
got it.
And then a few days later, the President, the PRESIDENT OF
THE UNITED STATES, uses it in a podcast.
How do I explain that?
If we want this word to go away, it needs to GO AWAY in
modern day language. Outside of
historical context to teach it’s origin, it should not be spoken, written, or heard.
Mr. President, I've never been your biggest fan, your political
ideology is different than mine.
However, I've always respected anyone in the office, because it is a job
much more difficult than I could ever imagine, and, well, just because I’m an
American. I’m struggling now, with that
respect. I teach my child that respect
is something to be earned. I teach my
child that certain actions do not earn respect.
How can I, as a Mom and as someone who respects themselves, make
exceptions to my standards just because of someone’s title? You could have been an example of a higher
standard and just said, “The ‘N’ word.”
I just wrote an entire blog without using the word, and no one has
questions to what I’m talking about. It's
not necessary.
That’s why they have wine.
No comments:
Post a Comment