Thursday, April 7, 2016

Ironies of Life

1. Having to deal with wrinkles and pimples at the same time

2. After you finally think you understand toddlers, your child becomes a teenager

3. White wine does not necessarily come from white grapes

4. Windows that don’t open

5. Friends who think you are not accepting enough but don’t want you to be friends with someone they don’t like

6. Your kid can’t tell when the trash is full, but they are the only one in the house that can turn on the surround sound system

7. The Happiest Place on Earth makes you cry when you see your credit card statement

8. Exercise that causes arthritis

9. As soon as you feel like you’ve achieved the perfect body, standards change

10. Self cleaning ovens still require your involvement

11. Using your cell phone for hours and never speaking to anyone

12. Having 500 TV channels and nothing to watch

13. No one is alarmed when a car alarm goes off

14. Diet foods can still make you fat

15. Daylight Savings Time does not increase the amount of daylight or time.

That’s why they have wine.


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