Pre-Flight Instructions

You know how when you get on a plane, they instruct you, in case of emergency, to use your air mask on yourself before using it on your child? (Ha, this is the second situation this week I'm using this analogy for!) Well, that is because you need to take care of yourself first to be in a condition to be able to take care of someone else.

It goes against every instinct you have as a parent. It makes you feel like you are being selfish and uncaring. It doesn't seem like the "compassionate" thing to do. Yet, it is necessary.

Our country's first priority is to protect and take care of it's own citizens. We need to make sure we've got that taken care of, before we can reach out and help others.

If we defy that instruction to use the air mask on ourselves first, we may risk the lives of both ourselves and our child.

If we deny that we need to take care of our own citizens, we are risking the livelihoods of both them and those we would like to help, if not the lives of both.

Wanting to scrutinize who comes in to our country, be it refugees, people casually crossing our southern border illegally, or all of those who actually go through the lengthy process to come here legally, is not paranoid or stupid. Wanting to make sure we can take care of our homeless and needy American citizens, especially those who served in our military, before we help others, is not uncompassionate.

Right now, we've often been failing in both protecting and taking care of our own citizens. Many people are concerned that this is going to get even worse. Calling them names, calling them stupid, saying they don't care, how is that going to help? They need to feel secure in the choices they are making. If your child found someone to be scary because the way they dressed was not what they were used to seeing, would you call them an uncompassionate, hating, idiotic Nazi? Or would you express you lovingly explain to them why you feel how you do, while acknowledging that fear is a normal reaction to the unknown?

Personally, I think our greatest physical threat comes from our we-only-pretend-to-be-protected borders, rather than from refugees. Someone who wants to do harm isn't going to care about the legality of getting here to do it. I am, however, concerned that we don't have all the resources to take care of people from other countries when I pass people begging on street corners every day. You can call me selfish, scared, xenophobic, whatever you want for that, but it doesn't make it so. I just tend to look at the big picture and find where there could be things that could cause a plan to not work as we want. There are plenty of other people who think like I do. I think it is wonderful that people want to help the others of the world, but the Spock side of me just sometimes wonders if it is practical.

I will use the air mask on myself first.

That's why they have wine.