The Comfort of Routines

Every weekday morning it is the same thing….starting out at 7:45 for my hour and 15 minute commute taking Aiden to school and driving to work.  And the routine is always the same.

About 10 minutes into the drive, Aiden yells, “Horse crossing!”  A little way further, “Donkey!”

Around the time we turn the corner, “Mom, shhhh, the funny guy is on,” referring to the Earl Pitts short on the radio.  As that is ending, “Dream house!” closely followed by “Mini dream house!” and “Truck crossing!”

When we get to the intersection where we inevitably have to wait at the red light, it’s “Middle school high school!”

A few minutes later we are almost to school, as we turn the corner onto the street the school is on, he checks to see if the cows are in the field and the German Shepard is in the yard, and expresses his disappointment if they are not there.  And on we go…

“One…..”

“Two…..”

“Three….”

“Four….”

“Five….um, I think, Five, right Mom?”

“Six….”

“Seven….”

And lastly, in a sing song voice, “….And that’s all the speedbumps in the road!”

Today Aiden started Spring Break so I didn’t have to take him to school.  My drive took half the usual time and I didn’t have to listen to the monologue.  And it just wasn’t the same, I truly missed the morning tradition. 

And, well, I still had to go to work while he was on vacation!  That’s why they have wine.

Just Say No

Earlier this evening I went outside to take out the trash, and Aiden’s friend asked, “Hey, can Aiden play inside my house for a little while?” 

“Sure, if your mom says it’s ok.”

His friend then replied to him, “See, she’ll let you.”

Aiden then ran over and whispered to me, “I don’t want to play inside, can you say I can’t?”

“No,” I quietly said back.  “It will be dark in 10 minutes, you’ll need to come in then,” I then said out loud, and went back in the house.

Five minutes later, he came in, and I got on to him for asking me to lie.  I told him that if you don’t want to do something, you have every right to just say “No.”  I told him that his wants and needs are just as valid as those of someone else, that he doesn’t need to explain his reasons, that what he wants is OK.

I explained that we say what we mean, that’s how we roll.

Or is it? 

How many times do we agree because we are afraid someone may not like us if we don’t?  That they might talk about us behind our backs?  That they may think something bad about us?  Hmm, yep, I’ve done that recently and the reason I was mad about it was because I was mad at myself.

Thank you, kid, for making me realize that sometimes I need to practice what I preach.  Our opinions and our needs and our wants, they are who we ARE, and we don’t need to justify them.  And in this house, we are people that say what we mean, because we are perfectly OK with who we are.

Sometimes we just forget.  That’s why they have wine.